K so I'm fixing my life by choosing to move to Arizona. I'm going with my friend/sister Jessica who I lived with back in the days of the children's home. We're moving right around Christmas. At first I was scared to death and backed out, but I realized that I hate this place and I need to get away from all the negative crap here. Derek and I are broken up now, he said he was supportive of whatever I did but then he spazzed out and said mean stuff to me including "you are the worst person I've ever known" and the very last thing I heard from him was "i really hate you i'm in bed with a girl drunk now" wtf????? who does that. He's 28 and he's acting like a 12 year old, no joke. I finally realized I don't really love him at all I just love the idea of having a boyfriend and I always felt like I needed that attention from a guy since I didn't have it growing up. I'll miss the cuddling and being able to call someone 5 times a day just because we feel like it, but I kind of feel free now as cheesy as that sounds. I wouldn't mind being single for a little while but I also wouldn't mind moving on to another (better) relationship once I get moved and settled a bit.
We're planning on moving to Mesa, which is a city in the Phoenix metropolitan area. Pretty excited about skipping winter and lounging poolside. I'm going to find a full time job (hopefully) once we get there and take an online class or two...on my new macbook fucking pro!!! lol. I can't get residency until a year according to the guy who works at University of Phoenix where I'll be taking the online classes from. I guess that's okay, what can you do really? I've been wasting my time up here with the anti-motivation I have towards school up here. I completely fucked up this semester and have ended up with no credits. The ridiculous part is that my classes weren't hard and I haven't been partying hardly at all. It's just depression fucking with me and so I'm trying something new. Hopefully it works.